But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
- Matthew 5:28
Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.
- Colossians 4:6
But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.
- Ephesians 5:3-4
Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.
- 2 Timothy 2:22
The Larger Catechism has twenty points for this question and biblical proofs for each point. I will only provide the biblical references so that you can look them up at your leisure.
1. Prov. 5:7; Prov. 4:23, 27.
2. Heb. 13:4; Eph. 5:5; Gal. 5:19.
3. II Sam. 13:14; Mark 6:18; I Cor. 5:1, 13.
4. Rom. 1:26, 27; Lev. 20:15, 16.
5. Matt. 15:19; Col. 3:5; Matt. 5:28.
6. Eph. 5:3, 4; Prov. 7:5, 21; Prov. 19:27.
7. Isa. 3:16; II Peter 2:14.
8. Prov. 7:10, 13.
9. I Tim. 4:3.
10. Lev. 18:1–21.
11. II Kings 23:7; Lev. 19:29; Jer. 5:7.
12. Matt. 19:10–12.
13. I Tim. 5:14, 15; Gen. 38:26.
14. Matt. 19:5; I Cor. 7:2.
15. Matt. 5:32; Mal. 2:16.
16. See citations under Question 138. I Cor. 7:12, 13.
17. Ezek. 16:49; Jer. 5:7.
18. Eph. 5:11; Prov. 5:8.
19. Rom. 13:13; I Peter 4:3; Mark 6:22.
20. Rom. 13:14; II Peter 2:17, 18.
“Q. 58. What is forbidden in the Seventh Commandment?
A. The Seventh Commandment forbids all unchaste thoughts (Matt. 5:28; Col. 4:6), words (Eph. 5:4; 2 Tim. 2:22), and actions (Eph. 5:3).”
- Charles H. Spurgeon, Spurgeon’s Catechism (Scripture proofs in bold above)
“Q. 72. What is forbidden in the Seventh Commandment?
A. The Seventh Commandment forbiddeth all unchaste thoughts, words, and actions.”
- The Shorter Catechism (Westminster Assembly)
“Q. 139. What are the sins forbidden in the Seventh Commandment?
“A. The sins forbidden in the Seventh Commandment, besides the neglect of the duties required, are: adultery, fornication, rape, incest, sodomy, and all unnatural lusts; all unclean imaginations, thoughts, purposes, and affections; all corrupt or filthy communications, or listening thereunto; wanton looks, impudent or light behavior, immodest apparel, prohibiting of lawful, and dispensing with unlawful marriages; allowing, tolerating, keeping of stews, and resorting to them; entangling vows of single life, undue delay of marriage; having more wives or husbands than one at the same time; unjust divorce or desertion; idleness, gluttony, drunkenness, unchaste company; lascivious songs, books, pictures, dancings, stageplays, and all other provocations to, or acts of, uncleanness either in ourselves or others.”
- The Larger Catechism (Westminster Assembly)
The Shorter and Spurgeon catechisms have the same wording, almost. In a rare difference, the Spurgeon Catechism adds extra biblical proofs. The Larger Catechism adds twenty points, each with their own biblical proofs that are listed for extra research, if you desire.
Jesus said in the Sermon on the Mount that even having lust in our hearts is committing adultery. I heard a pastor once say, when he eyed a pretty waitress in the presence of his wife, “As long as I am on a diet, it does not mean that I cannot look at the menu.” While funny, that is simply not true. I can acknowledge that someone is beautiful. That is a statement of fact based on parameters that are generally established, although much is subjective. One article I read said that for a face to be beautiful or handsome, it must have symmetry. Forget mine. I bounced off a cyclone fence playing baseball and my left eye has a scar from the stitches, a permanent laugh line if you will. My nose has been broken three times. Please, no one suggest a fourth time so that it will finally be moved back to the center line.
We can see beauty, but in looking at the menu, we are, in our minds, thinking about devouring.
And I just heard an interview with the late Tim Keller. He spoke of how many times adultery is mentioned by Jesus and how many more times greed is mentioned. He was being badgered by the interviewer to say that homosexuality sends people to Hell, but he dodged the question entirely, by saying one sin, any sin, does not send you to Hell. What sends you to Hell is not having a life-giving relationship with God, recognizing God as our Father and Jesus as our Savior.
To illustrate adultery versus greed Tim Keller said that adultery is easy to spot. A man says, ‘You’re not my wife!’ But how do you easily recognize that you are greedy? Thus, it is more a heart issue. It is a matter of desire. When we desire nothing but God, then we do everything within our power to please and glorify God. And God is pleased when a married couple, consisting of a man and a woman enjoy each other.
The Larger Catechism goes into a great deal of detail and many might consider it draconian detail. But consider the sitcoms of today versus the Larger Catechism definition of the seventh commandment. We are being brainwashed into thinking that the bawdy joke or the hint or inuendo of naughtiness is acceptable. After a while, we get the idea that the entire concept of this commandment is old-fashioned and out-of-date. Why? Due to the constant bombardment of those fringe issues.
And remember, it is not the sin as much as the attitude and desire that we have. And when we fill our minds with those fringe issues being acceptable, the lines blur until we are worshipping the flesh instead of worshipping God.
And now let us sing.
The following song is When I Say I Do, sung by the composer, Matthew West.
“There must be a God, I believe its true
‘Cause I can see His love, when I look at you
And he must have a plan for this crazy life
Because He brought you here and placed you by my side
And I have never been so sure of anything before
Like I am in this moment here with you
Now “for better or for worse” are so much more than only words
And I pray everyday will be the proof
That I mean what I say when I say, “I do”
Yeah, I mean what I Say when I say, “I do”
Oh, oh
You see these hands you hold
Will always hold you up
When the strength you have just ain’t strong enough
And what tomorrow brings
Only time will tell
But I will stand by you in sickness and in health
‘Cause I have never been so sure of anything before
Like I am in this moment here with you
And now, for better or for worse
Are so much more than only words
And I pray every day will be the proof
That I mean what I say when I say, “I do”
Yeah, I mean what I say when I say
Take my hand and take this ring
And know that I will always love you through anything
Yeah
And as the years march on like a beating heart
I will live these words ’til death do us part
‘Cause I have never been so sure of anything before
Like I am in this moment here with you
And now for better or for worse
Are so much more than only words
And I pray everyday will be the proof
That I mean what I say when I say, “I do”
Yeah, I mean what I say when I say, “I do”
Yeah, yeah
- Matthew West, When I Say I Do
Closing Prayer
Dear Lord,
You are our God. You have set apart that one that we can share our life with. Thank You Lord for giving me my spouse. Only in Your perfect plan can the union survive until death do us part. And personally, since my wife died two months ago and the memorial is later this week, thank You Lord for letting me have 48 years with the most giving woman that I have ever met. She truly had a servant’s heart and You led both of us together. Looking back, there is no reason for me to ever think of another.
In thy Name we pray.
Amen
Soli Deo Gloria. Only to God be the Glory.
Thoughts from Mark "Hat" Rackley 
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