Thoughts from Mark "Hat" Rackley

I’m Lieutenant Deviled Yeggs.  I work homicide in the big city of Tracy.  Working for me are my old partners: Detective Sgt. Jim Wednesday and Detective Poached Yeggs, my nephew who is slowly becoming a good detective.

My daughter has been the head of the “codebreakers” since a suspected serial killer had challenged Sophie, Pauline Niblick, and GrandPa in a game of solving riddles.  She is a member of the Rogue Scholars, who act as a think tank to try to find better solutions to such things as hostage situations.  And she is the head of security when her boyfriend, Emmett Dalton, and her BFF, Menzie MacDougall, perform at the Snazzy Taz Jazz Club.  All three are underage to be in the Snazzy Taz, but Sophie’s crew is mostly comprised of retired police officers.  Yes, she deals with payroll, with a little help from the Lily the Pink comptroller, Tommie Tat.

To add to all that, she and Blaise now run “Design by Tensie.”  Blaise really runs things from day to day.  He spent as much time as possible with Aunt Tensie before she died, that he absorbed her way of tackling problems.  Blaise is the COO, Mr. Inside, mostly staying inside in the lab, but Sophie is Miss Outside, thinking outside the box, but hardly ever spending time in the lab.  She is the CIO, Chief Idea Officer, in case Blaise got stuck, trapped inside the box, but she also added an artistic flare to the designs.  Those were Aunt Hortense’s assessment of my middle two children.

And oh, yeah, Sophia Yeggs is just a sophomore in high school.  She wants to join the police force and become my boss before I retire, and Captain Hart has made it known that he will step aside and let her have the job.

The first football game marked the first time in a long time that she and Blaise both wanted to go to a high school football game, first time doing anything outside their activities already mentioned.  Just an evening to relax, except that Menzie sang the national anthem, Emmett played a jazz accompaniment for Menzie that got mixed reviews, and Sophie pushed through the crowd after the anthem to get them to the student section where Margie and Blaise, Jemima and Easter, and Samuel Farquharson awaited the head of security and her two charges, saving them three seats with the other high school students.  They also had TomCat, Thomas and Catherine ver Waarloosd, along since they never had seen a football game before.  TomCat had to return to the valley of the windmills with the merchant before the game started when they had been in high school.  Sure, Jemima and Easter are in college along with TomCat, but other than Jemima’s baby bump, they could pass for high schoolers, all four of them.

The occasion was that Central Baptist, where Minnie Others coaches the girl’s teams, was playing Vitamin Flintheart for the first time in football, not with Minnie coaching.  Central Baptist was a smaller school, in a smaller school conference, but since they were independent and private, they could offer scholarships to anyone in Tracy, from any school district, if they wanted to come to Central Baptist.  Those parents who agreed with the family values they espouse jumped at the chance.  So, we had no idea who might win the game.

We, the parents of the kids, sat in the adult section, all of us together.  Mostly a bunch of Yeggs, but the Daltons came along with Arabella and Sarah.  The Justices, Margie’s parents, were without children; Rev. C.S.L. and his family, and Judge Farquharson and his wife were there.  Callie, the wife of Poached, and Minnie Others were with us.  Minnie sat on our side as an alum of Vitamin Flintheart, but she was going to visit the other side at some point.  Poached and Wise Guy (Guy Weiss, who passed the sergeant’s exam) were on patrol as in-stadium security in the rare event that there is a fist fight in the stands.  They were getting paid, but a minimal amount.

I will write this as a third person report, since I was not there for any of the action, just the aftermath.  When I show up, I’ll switch it to me in first person, if you don’t mind.  The report is as accurate as any police report, and this one became one.

Sophie was getting tired.  She kept saying “Excuse me, pardon me, musicians coming through.”  No one listened.  They had missed the kick-off and Central Baptist went three and out to start the game.  Sophie was making headway at one point, but then the punt returner ran back fifty yards into the Baptist red zone.  That caused everyone to start dancing in the aisles.  Then, when a penalty brought the ball back, they were screaming at the refs.  Sophie and her two musicians were trapped for a while.

When they finally got to their seats, Easy said, “I’m going to get hot dogs for everyone, and a few big bags of Kettle Corn.  Blaise, do you want to come along and help carry the drinks?”  Blaise nodded.  He liked the school, but he was not much of a sports fan.  That left Jemima to explain the game to TomCat.  She probably knew more about football than Easy did anyway.

Not long after Easy and Blaise left, there was a disturbance at the end of the row, where Menzie sat, watching her first football game, sitting next to Samuel Farquharson who was officially her boyfriend.  Since Jemima was at the far end of the row, Jemima could not help out.  As it turned out, that was probably best.

Billy Bulbous put his hand on Menzie’s shoulder.  He had three of his thugs with him, Dan being one of them.  They stood in front of Samuel, where he was unable to see the game, but they were also blocking the row behind them.

Billy said, “You sang good, Sweet Cheeks!  I’m gonna take you to my special place and show you a good time.”

Sophie, who was sitting next to Menzie stood up.  She asked, “Did you say you were taking her?  She does not want to go.”

Billy asked, “The songbird can speak for herself, and she says she wants to go. If she knows what’s good for her.”

Margie jumped up, “Leave my friends alone.  Menzie’s just a freshman, and you’re scaring her, Billy.”

Sophie said, “So, this is Billy Bulbous.”

Billy said, grabbing Sophie by the bra, but she shrugged away, “Yeah, and nobody says no to Billy.”

Margie said, “They are this time, Billy.”

Billy said, “And the star pitcher for the softball team can shut up, too.”

Sophie said, “Menzie, do you want to go with Billy?  Billy, what do you mean by showing her a good time?”

Dan shoved a few people in the lower row in the back to walk around Billy to get in close to Sophie.  He made an obscene gesture that made it clear that they were going to have sex.

Menzie said, “I am not going anywhere with this creep.  He smells.”

Samuel stood up. “I am Menzie’s boyfriend, and I agree that she is not going anywhere.”

Billy was older and much bigger.  He shoved Samuel, but Samuel did not fall.  You could tell Billy was getting angry.  He had a reputation of putting people in the hospital.

Dan was now blocking Sophie from getting to Billy.  He kept making the obscene gesture with his two hands and pointed to Sophie and then to himself.  He said, “And you are going to love it.  I can make you howl!”

Dan grabbed Sophie with a grip that felt like a vice.  Sophie brought up her knee sharply into Dan’s groin.  He was a lot bigger, so she went for a second shot with the knee, but Dan was not ready for the sudden blow, he was bending over, and Sophie’s second knee kick caught him in the chest, just below the rib cage.  He lost the hot dog that he had stolen from the concession stand, and eaten, throwing up into a girl’s hair on the row below.  Now with her hand free, Sophie punched him in the ear and Dan went down hard.

While this was going on, Billy took a punch at Samuel.  Samuel blocked it, throwing Billy off balance a bit.  Samuel punched him back quickly, but it had no effect.  Billy threw a dozen more punches.  Samuel blocked each one, making a weak return punch each time.  Then Billy tried to get inside Samuel’s range of blocking his punches.  That is when Menzie kicked him in the groin.  With him doubling over, Samuel had a great shot to punch Billy near the temple.  He was out cold.  The other two thugs disappeared.

The girl, with vomit in her hair, turned around.  She hit Dan on the head with her purse.  “You raped me last week and now you throw up on me!  You jerk!  Oh, wait. I didn’t say that!  No one heard that.”

Sophie said, “Too late, Candy.  I heard you.  How many more of you have been terrorized by these guys?”

Half the boys and all the girls averted their eyes.  They had stories, but they were not telling them.

Then a man with a five o’clock shadow approached.  “I saw the whole thing.  These girls beat these two boys up without provocation.  I’m going to wait here until security shows up and have the three of them arrested.”

Candy said, “Wait!  Billy and Dan started it!  It was self-defense.”

About this time, Poached and Guy arrived.  Poached started to say something, but the man interrupted to repeat what he had said before.  Sophie said, “Mr. Security Officer, Sir, he’s lying.  It was self-defense.”

Then Candy yelled, “They are coming to.  Put handcuffs on them before they kill somebody.  Nobody has ever beaten Billy or Dan in the past three years.”

Guy worked fast and had the cuffs on the two boys who were just coming out of their little “nap.”

Billy spit some blood from his mouth and started talking about how he was sucker punched when all he had done was to ask the songbird out.

Poached said, “Let me hear what this short girl has to say.  The redhead first.”

Menzie said, “Billy grabbed me by the shoulder.  He said he was taking me someplace, and I would like it, whatever he was going to do.  Then he grabbed my wrist and hurt me.  That’s when Samuel got up to defend me.  Billy was throwing all the punches.  Samuel was just blocking them.  Since I could tell Samuel was getting tired, I kicked Billy, and then Samuel finally got to hit back.  Samuel, I didn’t know you knew how to fight.  I am so proud of you.”

Samuel said, “When you started singing at the Snazzy Taz, I started taking Taekwondo lessons.  I wanted to be on Sophie’s security team.  I wanted it to be a surprise for you.”

Menzie gushed and hugged him, “It was a big surprise at just the right time.”

Poached said, “And they said Sophie.  Is that you, Miss?”

Poached got the clue that the man was looking out for Billy for some reason.  “Yes, Sir.  I was going to the defense of my client.  I have my license for private investigations and bodyguard duties in my purse.  With Menzie in danger, I stepped in, but Dan here cut me off.  He made a hand signal that he and Billy were going to have full penetration sex with Menzie and me.  Billy had hinted it was somewhere close.  Billy grabbed my breast and pulled my bra.  Then Dan grabbed me and pulled me.  I kicked him twice with my knee, too close to kick with the foot.  First to the groin and then just under the rib cage as he bent over.  My only punch landed near the ear.  You can see my arm starting to bruise.”

Candy muttered, “Someplace close, like the back of the main concession stand, in the storage room.  That’s where he takes people to do terrible things to them.  Where he keeps his drugs, but I didn’t say nothing.”

Jemima too far away to help, and very much pregnant, was texting me everything that her thumbs could type.  I was already close enough to hear some of it.  Judge Farquharson was with me.  When I flashed my badge, the adult “witness” told his story again.  I said, “Sir, for you to make a statement, I need to know your name, address, phone number, and your relationship to any of these people.”

It turned out he was Billy’s uncle.  He did not admit it, but he was watching Billy’s back.  We took his contact information and requested that he leave.  We had his statement.  We needed statements from others.  We would call him if we needed him.  If Billy was underage, a parent or guardian would have to be present during questioning.  If the boys were charged, he could be called for the bail hearing.

Judge Farquharson said that he had the duty that Saturday morning, but since Samuel was involved, he would have to make a call to have someone else be there.  He needed to recuse himself, at least for this one case.  Probably the other judge would simply swap Saturdays.

Two uniformed police took Billy and Dan away.  I gave them the uncle’s information.  But as we initially talked to Billy and Dan, Billy had been held back three times.  He was twenty-one.  Dan was eighteen.  If we had enough evidence of felonies, they would both be tried as adults.  There was no need for a parent to be present for questioning.  Other detectives, from Vice, would do the interviews, but I needed to get enough people to act as witnesses before these high school children scattered.

Poached and Guy went from row to row.  They got a distinct impression that Billy had bullied them, but they were afraid to talk.

I asked in as loud of a voice as I could muster.  “Do not be afraid.  The school and the police have known about this activity for a few years.  We have enough right now to hold Billy and Dan for trial, but we need to know everything that they have done.  Give us the evidence that we need now, and these guys may never get back on the streets, ever.  Who will be the first to step forward?”

Candy said, “I’ve got to go wash my hair!  I will go first.  Dan raped me last week.  Billy said that I wasn’t his type.  I had done Billy’s homework for him, and he did not get an “A+” so I had to be punished.  But he threatened to beat me up if I didn’t do the homework.”  Another girl said that she was slipped a ‘date rape’ drug a couple of months ago, and she thinks she was used by each of the four in Billy’s gang.  After those two, the crowd started raising their hands.  They had beaten the boys, and some of the beatings resulted with a broken arm.  Usually the “crime” was that they did not do Billy’s or Dan’s homework for them or did a poor job.  A few had been offered drugs.  Billy’s primary base of operations was the storage room for the main concession stand.  Billy had stolen a set of keys.  He had threatened, or beaten, a few volunteers, and it was easier for the volunteers to take a blind eye to the activities.  Judge Farquharson signed a warrant and we found drugs and weapons in the storage room.  Crime Scene had enough fingerprints to identify that four people were the only ones handling the stuff.  Two sets of prints matched Billy and Dan.  They had not yet apprehended the other two boys.  The high school students also identified the two other thugs that had run away.  Only one was under 18, but under the circumstances and the charges that were mounting, all four would be tried as adults.

With the interviews continuing a few rows below Sophie’s row with Poached and Guy asking each student’s experience with Billy and his crew, Easter came back loaded down with hotdogs in a big bag and drinks.  Blaise had the rest of the drinks.

Easy said, “You would not believe the line at the concession stand!  And then we were walking back here and the police stopped us while they carted off some guys in cuffs.  Did we miss anything?”

Sophie said, “Not much, Easy.  They’ve just punted back and forth a lot.  Flintheart just kicked a field goal to surge ahead three-zip.”  Everybody snickered.

Then Easy noticed me standing there.  “Dad!  What are you doing here?”

I said, “Just passing through, Easy.  Did you recognize the boys in cuffs?”

Easy said, “Not really, but we graduated some time ago, Dad.”

Jemima yelled from the other end of the row, “Where is the popcorn?”

Easy turned around.  He had strapped a huge bag of popcorn to his back.  “Enough Kettle Corn for everyone.”

Jemima asked, “Do you mean that I have to share?!”

There were some boo birds at the stadium when Minnie Others walked in her Flintheart colors around the end zone to the Central Baptist side, but then she threw on her Central Baptist coaching jacket.  She had wanted to show off her fiancé, but Guy Weiss was too busy.

In the meantime, with nothing but a constant barrage of interviews going on, Jemima got a chance to teach the ver Waarloosd couple the basics of football.  With the score 6-0 at halftime, both offenses opened up in the second half.  Flintheart won 19-17, with a last-minute field goal.  With only seconds left in the game, Central Baptist threw a pass in desperation as the clock was going down, and Flintheart intercepted the pass.  Then the Flintheart QB took a knee, and the game was over.

The next morning, I went by Lily the Pink, and I brought Sophie.  Samuel said he would ride his bike over.  We met with Menzie in Pink Lady’s office.  I interviewed each of them individually.  Gisele had met us there to take dictation, but I had the interviews recorded. 

Then the only thing that we had to change was that Sophie had said, “gesture indicating full penetration sex.”  I knew it was embarrassing but I had to ask her to say exactly what it was.

Sophie turned red and said, “You know, Dad.  You cup your fingers like you are grabbing a chin up pole, making a circle.  Then you take a certain finger of the other hand and slide it in and out of the hole you made.”

I groaned, “Yes, that only meant one thing when I was in school.”

Sophie said, “They’ve probably been doing that since Isaac did that to Rebekah to let her know it was time to go into the tent.”

I asked, “Why not Abraham and Sarah?”

Sophie made a face, “Ewww!  Dad!!  They were old.  That’s just icky!”

Gisele typed their statements on Pink Lady’s laptop and printed them for the children to sign.  We needed that done in a formal setting since each had struck blows in their own defense.  Both girls had bruises on their wrists and arms where they had been grabbed.

Then Sophie said, “But Daddy, I have one more bruise.  It’s the nastiest, but I am embarrassed to show it as evidence.”

“Why, Sophie?” I asked.

Sophie pulled off her T-shirt and she pointed to her bra.  We maneuvered her bra to see enough of the bruise without her removing it.  Gisele took the picture.  Gisele whispered, “You are turning into a looker, young lady.”

Then Sophie asked, “Daddy, we knew Billy was doing bad things, but how could this happen?”

I sighed, “You three sit down.  I will tell you a sad tale.  Billy was an oversized brute, even in kindergarten.  His father had run off when Billy was about two or three.  The uncle that you saw last night helped his sister raise Billy.  Then he was held back in the second grade, fourth grade, and fifth grade.  In middle school, he was not making the grades, but since he was so much older, they let it slide, advancing him in spite of him showing a lack of the basic knowledge required to understand the material in the next grade.  He probably had a learning disability that was left undiagnosed.  So, when he reached high school, he already had a driver’s license, probably having someone coach him through the written test or taking it for him.  He might not rate fourth grade reading level.  He was roughly the age of a high school graduate and he wanted to date the girls.  The girls turned their noses up at him for good reason, but since he was stronger, he raped a few.  He enlisted his buddies: Dan, Joe, and Jake.  They became holy terrors.  But grabbing girls bored them.  They became drug pushers, selling drugs to classmates.  They found that “date rape” drugs were easier than brutally raping their victims.  When they made enough money selling drugs, they got into weapons.  Everything in the concession stand storage room has been confiscated.  I am not in the know regarding their houses, but what a Vice detective told me, they had stuff in their bedrooms and in storage lockers in their parents’ garages.  They may go after the parents as accessories, no way they did not know when there were large bins of drugs and weapons in the garage.  And Billy’s uncle has been arrested already.  He followed the boys in case the boys got into trouble.  The standard response was that the boys would make it clear that they knew where everyone lived, and their houses would be burned to the ground with them in it.  We only have one unsolved arson case that might be them carrying out that threat.  You have to do it once to make the threat believable.  They had teachers at the school that were too afraid to say anything.”

Sophie asked, “But Billy, Dan, and Jake would not be truant if they just quit going to school.  Why hang around?”

I shrugged, “They were having too much fun?  Their drug clients were there.  There were more girls they could conquer.  And maybe most importantly, their parents hated the idea of them staying at home all day.  But I think they wanted to have people do their homework enough and cheat on the exams to get them that diploma.  They wanted the diploma because they felt inferior without it.  They were too proud to have that held over their heads.”

Sophie asked, “So, what is next?”

I shook my head, “That’s for Vice, the D.A., and the court to decide.  With the mountain of evidence and the reputation of the four boys, bail was denied.  If they appeal that, they might get out, but they will have an ankle bracelet.  The school security has been informed that all four are expelled and not allowed on the property.  Frankly, I hope one of them cracks to give us their drug and weapon connections.  This has Empire Apple written all over it.  Georges Evident is part of the interview team.  He was excellent in interviews while a patrolman here and he has had a few classes since then.  We have hope.  But I have a feeling that the principal, superintendent, and president of the school board will all have an assembly or statements over the intercom to state that you are safe at school, safer than you have been for a while.”

Gisele was finished with her typing.  She would file the signed affidavits on Monday.  She left after kissing the two girls on the head and saying how brave they were.  Then after Samuel and Menzie went back to the MacDougall apartment to “study,” supervised studying, Sophie asked if she could sit on my lap.  I asked if she wanted a bear hug, and she shook her head.

“Daddy?” she said in an asking tone.  I could feel her shake.  She was crying.  “It hurts.  The thing Aunt Gisele took a picture of.  I would love for someone to kiss it and make it feel better, but you can’t do that.  That is beyond icky; it’s just wrong.  I would love for Emmett to do it, but he won’t.  He is like you.  It’s a slippery slope and once we go that far, our guard may be down.  We might go further.  A medicinal kiss might turn into a romantic kiss.  That makes the pain even worse, Daddy.  And last night, after the fight was over, Menzie and Samuel kissed more than they watched the game.  They even licked the mustard off each other’s faces.  I know that at the Snazzy Taz that I get paid to protect them.  I spent a lot of time with Tommie Tat working out the contracts, both between me and the club and between me and each of my guards.  But Samuel stood up and fought Billy to protect Menzie.  Emmett just sat there.  I know.  He had his saxophone to protect.  He didn’t have martial arts skills.  He gave me a side hug afterwards.  We kissed.  He said he was proud of me, but I feel cheated, Daddy.  I cheated myself by being the bodyguard.  Last night, I wanted what Samuel and Menzie had.  Sure, if Billy and Dan had overpowered us, we would be having a totally different conversation, but it still hurts, Daddy.”

I gently wrapped my arms around her.  I kissed her on top of her head.  “I know, Sweetie, I know.”

Credits

When I first moved to the Pittsburgh area, the other engineers would try to introduce me to “life in Pittsburgh.”  One topic was American football.  Pittsburgh has produced a lot of famous football players.  A few of the high schools have produced multiple professional football players.  But when the subject of Central Catholic came up, most of the guys would grumble that the rest of the schools had to play with the people in their district.  Central Catholic could claim anyone to be Catholic and get them to play for Central Catholic.  “It was like a pro team that played high school football.”  It was not that bad, but the field was slanted toward the Central Catholic side.  Fifteen players, to date, from Central Catholic played or are still playing in the NFL.  Since quarterbacks are better known than most other players, you may have heard of Marc Bulger (Baltimore Ravens) and Dan Marino (Hall of Famer who played for the Miami Dolphins).  Over my 25+ years in the area, Central Catholic is always a contender for the championship in their classification, but they do not always win.

In my experience, children who repeatedly fall behind will drop out in high school or middle school once they reach sixteen, but there is something comforting and safe about a school, even for the troublemakers, and if you are bad enough, or the reputation of being that bad, you can rule by fear.  But then, it only takes one to give evidence and then the flood will start.

I was bullied in elementary school and middle school, but after I returned to that school as a junior in high school, the bullies had either dropped out or reformed.  The year after my class graduated however, the school became a mess with violence and drugs, requiring security and hall passes for everyone, with visitors having to be escorted to the classroom.  I had to drop something off for my former Chemistry and Physics teacher, and I was shocked by the changes in just a few months.

These days there are cyber bullies.  They can be unseen.  You may never know who the person is that started the lies flowing, or a truth that you wished to have buried deep.  But as cyber gossip spreads, anyone can read it.  Anyone can exaggerate as they spread it.  And suddenly, you have no friends.  Maybe a couple of close ones that know the truth.