Thoughts from Mark "Hat" Rackley

I’m Pink Lady Apple Yeggs and my friend, and brother-in-law, Deviled Yeggs suggested that I record each project that I set up in the hopes of reforming the people who continue to work for Lily the Pink Enterprises.  If for no other reason, it would show how God is at work.

Like last year, Mary Sheltie Jones has come up with a Thanksgiving Pageant.  She will tape and edit the dress rehearsal, but have the performance taped live, whether it works out or not.  Bloopers can be more entertaining than the real thing.  Maybe because bloopers are more real.

This pageant is in the children’s own words.  Mary (B.B.) and Jemima (Stinker) interviewed the children that were talkative.  We have a lot of children who are talkative, but they say that Kanok has a big part, and I should not get upset when she throws a fit.  It was a change in the script, but she sticks to the new script.

But a stage full of little children was not what I saw.  Then again, I was early.  I sat on the second row, and the two chatterboxes, Wilma Slay and Arabella Dalton, were immediately in front of me.  They were both in Turtle-eer, or should it be Turtleer, uniforms.  Arabella wore her pink coveralls last year, since they can be set with D-rings, but now she is officially on the team part-time.  I thought about moving, but then Wilma said something interesting.  Okay, I’m nebby (nosey).

Wilma asked, “Did you try what I suggested?”

Arabella giggled, “Yeah, and it worked.  Michael and I were at the farm.  We helped Barry and Clyde with milking the goats, but Mom and Dad had some things to check out.  So, Michael and I went on a walk along the fence line.  We walked down to the creek and then north, along the creek, to the cattle enclosure.  I just smiled and looked at Michael.  And then it happened.  He leaned in and gave me a great kiss.  It was electric!  It was shocking.  I have never had a kiss like that.”

Wilma said, “I told you the silent treatment would work.  Michael must be a good kisser.”

Arabella laughed, “No, I backed into the electric fence.”

I bit my tongue.  I didn’t want to let them know that I was eavesdropping.  But when the chatterboxes learn the silent treatment, their boyfriends are in trouble.

Wilma asked, “Does the electric fence hurt?”

Arabella groaned, “It doesn’t feel good, but it doesn’t really hurt.  We have it set to burn the weeds off, so it is a little stronger shock, but it is there to encourage the animals to stay in the field instead of roaming into the neighbor’s field.  We built a little pond in a low area of the cattle enclosure.  The creek feeds it, and the cattle can get water there or near their feeding troughs.  They don’t ever need to leave, but I think they were thinking about cows when they said that line about how the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.  They’ll stick their heads between the wires, getting shocked the entire time, just to get to some fresh grass.  But, Wilma, do not get the idea that you can sit on the wire.  It is not a pleasant experience.  The kiss though, that was very pleasant, even the shock that went with it.”

Wilma said, “There’s B.B. signaling for us to get into position.”

As they ran off in opposite directions, I tried to find my three little ones on stage.  But I was quickly interrupted by an announcement of some sort.

Wilma was at the corner of the stage with a microphone.  Mitzi was holding the camera.  Wilma said, “This is Wilma Slay, reporting from inside the Crystal Mountain at Lily the Pink in the big city of Tracy.  There is no storm in sight, although there may be a shower soon.”

Mitzi said, “Shower?!  We’re inside.  Besides, I don’t have the camera waterproofed.  I don’t want to have to pay for a camera!  These things are expensive!”

Wilma said, “Calm down, Fitzi.  The rain usually comes a little later.  That is why the dress rehearsal is starting soon.  But if you want to get a good idea of the rain that we might get later on, you can go to the exotic tropical area in the hydroponic gardens.”

Mitzi asked, “Where is this exotic tropical area?”  Wilma sheepishly pointed upward.  Mitzi did a slow pan with the camera until she was nearly pointing the camera straight up.  Mitzi screamed, “Up there?  No way!”

Wilma said, “But we need the data to make an accurate forecast, Fitzi Mitzi.”

Mitzi handed Wilma the camera.  “No way!  They do not pay me enough to go up there.  I quit!”  Mitzi stormed off the stage.

Wilma said, “I was about to tell her that Amazon goes up there nearly every day, and she could fill in.  Now, we have to find another teammate for the Turtle.  Hmmm.”

From off stage, “Wilma!  …  Wilma!! … WILMA!!!!”

“Oh, Fred!” Wilma cried.  “Mitzi just quit.  I do not need any more trouble.”

Fred came up from behind the stage carrying a steering wheel, like he was still driving.

Wilma said, “I think that wheel belongs to the Turtle, Fred.  What have you done?”

Fred sighed, “I was practicing the evasive action procedures, and I went to press a button on the dash, I found that my hands were glued to the steering wheel.  Somebody must have pulled a prank on me.”

Wilma tried to work his fingers free.  Then she huffed, “What we need is the A-Team!”

At that, Easy, Stinker, B.B. and Home Wrecker walked out on stage.  Home Wrecker asked, “You called?”

Wilma pointed to Fred’s hands.  B.B. groaned, “Stinker, Easy has been at it again.”

Stinker growled, “Easy, you know what to do, but next time, do not eat rice while working on the Turtle.”

Easy took Fred by the elbow.  “Come on, Fred.  Cold water running over your hands until the water is clear.  That means the starches have been rinsed.  The same thing happened to ‘Mama’s Man’ and he survived.”

Fred asked, “Survived?  I want better assurance than that!”

Home Wrecker turned to the audience.  “We couldn’t think of a better way to introduce you to the B Team.  It was scripted, but they did a great job.  Our new driver is Fred, codename, Flintstone.  Our new photographer, if she did not really quit, is Mitzi, codename, Fitzi Mitzi, our new camera person.”

Mitzi jumped back on stage and bowed.  “I really need a new codename.  I am not fitzi.  I do not throw fits!”  She emphasized her words by stomping her feet on the portable stage, which makes a lot of noise.

Home Wrecker nodded, “I heard you the last time you threw a fit.  Do not worry.  You will make an even worse mistake, and we will have our new codename.”  Mitzi lowered her head and shook it.  “And Wilma, codename Hoople, who will make sure we have the right videos captured and do some directing.  B.B. is expecting and she will take this next semester off for the most part, but she will still do the film editing back here in Tracy.  Stinker will be back on the team more often, especially if we go from Sunday afternoon through Friday.  She has a Sunday school class to teach.  I will be back at the helm for the most part, but I need to be home for Joan’s doctor visits.  But, we have our junior Turtle-eers, Arabella Dalton, Mike Lothrop Kildare, and Michael Rowe Casey.”  The three came out waving at the crowd that had gathered.  “Arabella is codename Fireball.  Michael Rowe Casey is codename That’s My Boy.  And our new storm chaser is Mike Lothrop Kildare, codename Terrarium, maybe Terry for short.  Mike got on the team by building a scale model of the Crystal Mountain, complete with weather events.  He and his new step Dad, Dr. Kildare, who is our department head, have worked out a few details and they are going to use Mike’s terrarium at elementary schools and middle schools around the city, creating weather events that match what they see right here in the mountain.  All three of them will be on the Spring Break storm chase.  With all these on the stage, we will still have freshmen and sophomores that need their credits in storm chasing.”

The Turtle-eers all left the stage.  Emmett came out with his Sunday school choir.  Arabella, Mike, and Michael were still in their Turtle-eer coveralls, and the Drivers had probably just come from the kitchen.  They were cooking several turkeys, but I suppose during the roasting time, they could sing with the choir.  They sang Thank You Lord for Saving my Soul.

Then, Mary Sheltie Jones came to center stage.  “We interviewed the children that live here at Lily the Pink, at least those who were not yet teenagers.  We recorded their answers to the question of ‘What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?’  We have printed their responses for those that can read, and we have rehearsed with the younger ones.  If they get mixed up, Aunt Jemima and I will be there to prompt them.  And Mommie Pinkie, do not get upset when Kanok has a little meltdown, it is a well-practiced part of our presentation.  As a result, she will be last, but the others are going in order of descending age.  First up is one of our newest residents, Clarence Bell.  He likes to be called ‘Clay.’”

Clay came to the microphone.  “Hi everybody, I am Clay Bell.  I was in the backseat of the car that hit Lt. Deviled Yeggs car while Sophie was driving it.  The doctors said it was a miracle that I was not hurt really bad during the wreck because I was not wearing my seatbelt.  So, wear your seatbelt.  I am thankful that I survived.  I am thankful that they worked out a deal with the foster care system so that my Mom can visit some.  Since I have been in foster care for a while, I want to get to know her.  And I am thankful that the prettiest girl in school lives here at Lily the Pink.”  Clay waved at the meager audience, but I noticed that his mother, Tina, was a few rows behind me.

Jemima introduced Sarah Dalton.  Sarah boldly went to the mic, and she pulled out her tablet.  She moved her lips for a little bit, and then the tablet said in Sarah’s pretty voice. “I am Sarah Dalton.  I am thankful that Ralph E. Newman programmed my voice into the tablet so that I can talk.  I have had selective mutism ever since we lost our house in the flood, and this past year, we found out that I can sing when the mutism keeps me from talking. So…”  Then she put the tablet in her carrying case and approached the microphone.  She sang, “Hello, everybody, it’s good to see you here.  I’m thankful that I have a brother, who composed this tune for me.”  She was grinning from ear to ear, but she put her hand over her mouth and ran off the stage.  And Emmett, Sophie, and Arabella were cheering.

Mary whispered, “Grace, you’re next.”

Grace Grunge walked up and said, “I am Grace Grunge, second grade.  I can remember when we came here.  I was so scared.  We were living in a dark place under a bridge.  But now we live here.  Mamma Jochebed is nice.  Mommy works for her when she doesn’t go to the nurse’s office.  So, I got to be with my Mommy while we got to know everybody here.  I am thankful for everyone that works here.  I am thankful that Mommy and Daddy both have jobs here.”

Gretchen walked out without being prompted.  “I am Gretchen Grunge.  I am thankful for Zuzka.  She was the first friend Grace and I made here.  And I miss being at the nursery all day, but I am now in kindergarten.  And I am thankful that I like my school and my teacher.”

Reuben then came out.  “I am Reuben ver Waarloosd.  I am thankful for Daddy’s hard rolls and for Mommy’s chickens and turkeys.  And I am thankful for Thanksgiving.  Cause then Mommy can make room in the brooder house for the baby turkeys to grow.”

Jemima said, “Yes, that is the way he said it in the interview.”

Valin was next, “I thank God for last year in the pageant, I got to be a Native American who was an Indian, but now I can just be an American from India.  I love it here.  There are so many places to climb.”

Mary said, “The name Valin means the monkey king, and he loves to climb.”

Lauren who was next said, “I love to go to Aunt Jemima’s Sunday school class.  I am there with Mommy and Daddy and Mamma Missy and Granda Angus.  And I love saying the blessing at meals.  The food is so good.  And I love my Sunday school teacher at church, too.”

Then Dennis Lothrop Morrissey got up and said that he just stayed here during the day, but he was thankful for Mamma Jochebed, Nurse Greta, and the others.  And he was thankful that he had a new grandfather, Dr. Kildare.

He was followed by Liam who was short and to the point.  He was thankful for Grannie Fannie.

Grayson Grunge was just a baby when they came here.  He and Samantha ver Waarloosd gave one or two-word answers.  Kanok should have been next.  For the younger children, Aunt Jemima took the microphone and had them say one thing.

The next child was Joon.  He said, “Daddy’s Jelly Donuts.”  I had to admit that he loved his Daddy’s donuts, but at the present time, Joon ran everywhere.  He worked off those calories, but he had to cut down on the intake.  Joon liked his Daddy’s donuts far too much.

Sparkle was later on and she liked Vespers.  But Gloria Grace, my niece that they call Gigi, was there, and she didn’t say anything.

But now they went back to Kanok.

Mary said, “When we interviewed Kanok, she was the most talkative of all the children, as usual.  But when we rehearsed with the copy of what she said in the interview, this is what happened.”

Aunt Jemima said, “Kanok, it’s time to say what you are thankful for.”

Kanok said, “I don’t want to.”

Aunt Jemima asked, “Are you not thankful?  Or do you not want to talk about it?  You said some wonderful things.  You were thankful for the Crystal Mountain and the waterfall and the fresh vegetables and fruit.  You liked the smell of the cider cooking and the bakery smelled good.  Are you not thankful for those anymore?”

Kanok said, “Those are good things, but I did not do it right.  I did it wrong.”

Mary said, “Please, Sweetie, we copied your words.  All you have to do is say what you said before.  They are wonderful things to be thankful for.  You do realize that you are the one that inspired all this thanksgiving.  You asked why we had a Thanksgiving holiday when we are giving thanks every day.  We explained that not everyone is like we are at Lily the Pink.  They do not think about giving thanks, and maybe we should encourage them to do that by showing all the things we are thankful for.  This is all your idea.”

Kanok started to cry.  This was not acting.  She was upset.  She screamed, “No! Not gonna do it.  I want to say something…  I want to say something…”

Aunt Jemima asked, “What is it that you want to say?  Do you want to add to what you said?”

Kanok nodded her head, “I want to add something.”

Mary sighed, “Okay, Kanok.  What do you want to add?”

By now, Kanok’s eyes glistened with tears.  I could tell from the far side of the stage.  She said, “I want to…” she sniffled. “I want to thank God for Mommie Pinkie!  I love you, Mommie Pinkie!”

Kanok looked at me.  I knew what she was about to do, but I was on the second row.  She was about to run and jump off the stage toward me.  She might get hurt.  I quickly kicked the chairs where Wilma and Arabella had sat to each side and I ran to the edge of the stage, just as Kanok ran and took a flying leap into my arms.  Joon, always thinking that what had happened was another joke, started to laugh and he started running too, but now I was leaning against the edge of the stage.  He did not have to jump.  Then Pink Sparkle looked up and asked, “Mommie?”  And then she walked over.  Kanok shifted so that “Spa-Cool” could get in on the hug.  Then, the air was knocked out of my lungs from behind.  I quickly learned by whom.  Wilma and Arabella yelled in unison, “Group hug!!”  Then, every child that was on the stage, except one, ran over and joined in the group hug.

Mary said, ”That part was not in our modified script, but I think it is better than what we had planned.”

Emmett got back on stage, and while all the children were still in a group hug, we all sang “Jesus Loves the Little Children.”

The only one not in the group hug was Gigi, the one who did not say anything when the microphone was presented to her.  She had a little soccer ball, and she kicked it into the swimming pool.  Naomi, her mother, groaned, knowing someone had to retrieve the ball.  But Gigi screamed “Goal!” and she threw her hands into the air.

Naomi groaned, “No, Gigi, you kicked the ball into the pool, and someone has to go into the pool to retrieve it.”

Gigi was undeterred, “No, Mommie!  A goal!”  She waved her arms and then pointed with both arms at the pool.  Naomi and I looked at the pool.  We had the last water polo game of the year just a couple of days ago, and the goals were still floating at opposite ends of the pool, and in the end next to where the audience was sitting, Gigi’s soccer ball was in the goal.  Naomi jumped onto the stage to hug her daughter.  Naomi had dreamed of having a child that loved soccer.  She had once excelled in the sport, and none of her older children had been interested in the sport.  Now, Naomi’s dream might be coming true.

It took a while to untangle the mass of preschool children from the group hug, but Bea and Bro and Menzie and Samuel were ready to demonstrate some different dances.  It was like four acrobats were flying around the stage when they were doing swing dancing.  But then, they did some traditional folk dances, the four of them together.  And those dances seemed like something we could all do.

Then, to top off the performance, Anahera came out with the school children, Kindergarten through Samuel, Margie and Blaise who were seniors this year in high school.  They did a haka to bless all the Thanksgiving festivities.  I think the children just liked doing the dance and sticking their tongues out, but they were respectful to what Anahera had put together.

In all, it was a great message, and Kanok is right.  We do say thanks every day at Lily the Pink, and we have so many reasons to be thankful.

Credits

The three shouts of “Wilma”, each getting louder, was part of the closing credits of The Flintstones television show when Fred was locked out of the house.

Mary’s Thanksgiving pageant last year was a history lesson on how the day became a holiday.  This made it a little more personal.  This was the first of two days of Thanksgiving last year.  The link is HERE.

Here are Seth and Bessie Sykes singing Thank You Lord for Saving my Soul.  It is a lyric video, so you can sing along.

Here are the Cedarmont Kids singing Jesus Loves the Little Children.