The Other Video  – A Deviled Yeggs Mystery

Note from the Editor:  This story describes scenes of an adult nature including talking about sex.  Children should get permission from their parents before reading this, but since it talks about children that did not have permission from their parents, maybe I am wasting my time.

Note from Author:  I wrote this story because I had two teen-aged characters in this series of mystery stories who have been dating a long time.  They must navigate the lies that they are told by adults and their friends and even family so that they might someday find the truth without making mistakes that may be irrecoverable.  There are alternatives to the lifestyle that the world portrays.  The youth of today need to know what is happening within their bodies and that all that they hear from their friends is not necessarily true.  I wrote this in my usual style.  I hope to not offend.

I’m Detective Staff Sgt. Deviled Yeggs.  I work homicide in the big city of Tracy.  I had just led a taskforce that, once all the paperwork is done, we will have removed two international criminals, one on the top ten list, and four local members of organized crime, maybe more with some careful interrogation.  I only had a couple of hours of sleep on Friday night since Thursday morning.  It was now well after midnight on Sunday morning.  I was getting too old for this.  I did not think I could keep my eyes open, but after my wife, Glyce, mentioned two high school seniors on our sofa, making “trouble,” all alone in a big house, I could not go to sleep either.  She gathered the evidence off our security camera in the den that we also wired for sound.

Once I sat down, making sure the sofa was not sweaty where I sat, Glyce paused the video, before it had really started.  All that the television screen displayed was Easter Yeggs, our eldest son, and his girlfriend Jemima, who is our pastor’s daughter, sitting on the sofa.  Easter has the remote control in one hand and the other arm draped around Jemima’s shoulder.  Very innocent so far.

Glyce, short for nitroglycerin and sometimes just as explosive, was being very calm, too calm.  She said, “You objected to watching this due to violating the trust we have with our son, but Sophie ratted him out, thinking that the two teens had only watched an “R” rated movie that we would not have approved.  She walked into the house after her coach dropped her off after a soccer game – they lost if you are wondering, but Sophie scored a goal.  Sophie immediately saw, on the television screen, naked people in bed together.  She said she was telling on the two teens.  She told me.  I checked the security camera recording to see what movie it was.  Of “R” rated movies, this one had much more skin than most.  I had probable cause.”

I muttered, “but what else did you see?”

Glyce continued, “The first thirty minutes after Jemima arrived was high school small talk.  Who was dating whom?  How terrible was the pre-calculus exam?  Stuff like that.  Now for the juicy part.”

I wondered what the past generations would have done with this technology.  We would not have the security cameras ourselves if it weren’t for Blaise getting in trouble for his science experiments.  It was a means of preserving the house from fire or explosion more than anything else.

When the video started, Jemima was talking, “My friend, Ariadne, had sex with her boyfriend last night.  …  Easter, when are we ever going to get to second base?”  Easter grunted.  “I mean, we have been going steady for a year and a half.  I know, we had the lockdown and did a lot of our early dates virtually but come on!  They say the average for going all the way is the third date.  I have no idea who ‘they’ are, but they have probably had sex themselves.  We have had over thirty legitimate dates.  You are a great kisser.  We have first base covered.  We even went to jail for kissing in public.  That helped my P.K. [meaning preacher’s kid] cred, but it wasn’t quite satisfactory.  It was a simple kiss, just when that stupid mayor made it illegal in a public venue because of a stupid virus.  From my Dad’s first wife, they had three daughters.  All three had premarital sex before graduating high school, only the first waiting to her senior year.  With Ariadne being who I thought would be the last virgin in our class, now I have two reasons to ask this.”  She jumped up, grabbed her blouse to start to pull it over her head, but she stopped, and she said, “Let’s get naked and see what happens!”

Easter squirmed on the sofa, “Hunh?!  What?!”

Jemima shouted without moving any further toward disrobing, “I said for us to get naked.  We’ll get to second base, maybe third base, maybe not a home run until next time.  Are you not interested in girls?!”

Easter said, “Woah!  Woah!  I chose this movie because I heard there was a lot of nudity.  I thought watching a movie would calm down your desires to do Preacher’s Kid things.  But Jemima, we shouldn’t have sex just because you are the last virgin or because you are a Preacher’s Kid.  You are not the last virgin, and it is okay to be good.  Sex is a big step.  It should not be made on an impulse.  Besides, we have plans for our futures and if you got pregnant…”

Jemima produced a packet of several condoms and she said, “I am taking the pills.  We would be doubly safe.”

Even though the audio was faint, you could hear Easter swallow really hard.  “But sit down and let’s talk about this thing.  For one, I have never really understood this baseball analogy.”

Jemima sat down and groaned loudly, “First base is kissing.  Second base is fondling anything from the waist up or kissing anything.  For what it is worth, I could kiss your navel and that would be second base, but it would be dumb.  Third base is the same thing for the waist down.  And a home run is penetration sex, going all the way.”

Easter swallowed again.  Easter looked at the door that led to the hallway and the front door.  Could he be thinking of escaping?  But she was in his house.  He muttered, “Thanks for clearing that up.  I guess a couple of things on the second base list are fairly safe, but I still don’t know.  How do you know that your half-sisters all did it?”

“They told me, but the youngest had a video.  The oldest is Rebekah, Becky.  She thought she was the only virgin in her senior class, and she was tired of having to live a clean life while her friends had fun – the typical P.K. mantra.  Her boyfriend went farther than he had gone before with his hands and kissing, and she showed no resistance.  She let him go all the way with her basically a limp rag doll.  She almost immediately felt remorse.  She never told her parents, but she told Dinah, the middle child.  Becky was scared straight from that moment on, the typical church lady now.  But Dinah, hearing that Becky had done it, she, a year behind Becky in school, went out with her boyfriend the next weekend.  They smoked pot and then did the deed, upping the ante.  She felt no remorse, but when she was a senior in college, she met a Christian student, turned her life over to Christ, and they got married.  He is now a pastor of a small church.  Then there is Kathy.  She found out what her sisters had done through the usual pillow talk – all three sharing one bedroom in the manse.  She waited a year until she was a sophomore and sixteen years old.  She had a couple of girlfriends who had video cameras.  She arranged for her boyfriend to come over to her friend’s house.  They smoked pot, did some cocaine, and then pulled out the video equipment and made an amateur porn film.  Kathy was not satisfied with just doing what she thought was the ultimate Preacher’s Kid act, she made a video and showed it to her parents.  I know because she sent me a copy of the video last year.  I watched it, twice.  When her mother saw the film, she became catatonic.  Her mother was already battling cancer and she felt, with a wild child like Kathy, that she couldn’t continue to fight the disease.  She died a few months afterwards.  Kathy still refuses to repent, and she refuses to admit that she contributed to her mother’s death.  Our Dad refused to watch her video.  Once he saw what it was, he left the room and prayed.”

Easter asked, “With all that trouble because they did the deed, why do you want to join them?”

Jemima sighed, “You have no idea how hard it is being perfect.  You must be perfect, because it will reflect against your father’s message in the pulpit.  Other kids are doing all these things, and I am not allowed.  That makes me want to do them even more.”

Easter said, “You are wrong, Jemima.  I know what it is like.  I am a P.K.”

“Your father is a policeman, and your mother is a professor.  How is that a P.K.?” Jemima retorted.

“Both of those would be ‘P.K.’  Technically!  My mother not so much, but my Dad arrested me for jay walking one day.  He slapped the cuffs on me.  He threw me in the car.  He drove me to the police station.  I was crying my eyes out when he pulled me out of the car and took the cuffs off.  He was making a point that my actions reflected on his reputation in the community and in the church.  I doubt if you would get in trouble for jay walking.  I doubt if your father has handcuffs.  If he did, I doubt if he would use them on you.  You ought to think about what this might do to your father.”

“But I said that we can be doubly careful.  We tell no one.  No one will know except us.  Easter, I do not want to graduate high school and still be a virgin.  No one else will.”

Easter muttered, “Don’t be too sure.  Do you know Lilith?”

Jemima said, “We have a couple of classes together.  She had sex about a month ago.  She broke up with her boyfriend afterward and all the guys are chasing her wanting to be next.”

Easter shook his head, “We are Physics lab partners.  We were in the corner of the lab, and she thought it was safe to talk a couple of weeks ago.  She said that Tad, her boyfriend, slid his hand under her blouse and undid her bra.  She pulled away and told him that she wasn’t that kind of a girl.  What she didn’t know was that Tad had ripped the label off the bra as she pulled away.  He used that as his ‘proof’ that Lilith had done it with him, and he told everyone that she was easy.  She was telling me how she had done everything right, but now she had no reason to go on living.  I had to ask her to call the suicide hotline.  I gave her my phone and she got an excuse to go to the restroom, but she took the phone outside where the smokers hide.  I finished the experiment and joined her.  I knew it wasn’t right to leave her alone, but if we went out at the same time, they would be talking about me doing it with her.  She sounded like she wanted to die.  She felt a little better after she talked to the hotline.”

Jemima lowered her head, “I didn’t know.  I heard everybody talking.  Lilith is Gisele’s daughter, and everybody talks about Gisele making it with Captain Hart because Mrs. Hart is so sick.  I just assumed it was all true.  Like mother, like daughter.  You know?”

Glyce paused the video, “Is that true about Gisele and Al Hart?”

I shook my head, “She plays the game with Captain Hart, calling him pet names, rubbing against him, and he loves it, but he is faithful to his dying wife for all we know.  And the rubbing is to leave a little perfume behind.  She thinks he is less grumpy if he smells her perfume.  I haven’t noticed one way or the other.  Rumor has it that Gisele is seeing a ju…”

Glyce asked, “Who is she seeing?  …  No!  You are about to say that the rumors are that she is having an affair with a judge.  Probably the judge that signed the warrant for your raid last night.  She said that the judge owes Al Hart some favors, and she went to his home, so she probably did some mattress work, had him sign the warrant, and then she refreshed her perfume so that you got a good whiff, and the rest is history.  And you are just now realizing how she got the warrant signed.”  I could only nod, before she continued the video with a smug look on her face.

Jemima continued, “And I feel so inferior in the soccer showers after the games.  You have all the girls that like girls on one end and all the girls that have done it with boys at the other end.  I’m stuck alone in the middle.  The girls talk about how they have made love to college and pro athletes, and they have the jock straps to prove it.  They show everyone their trophies.  And me?  They say that I can score on the field, but while they go home with a stud, I go home with a …”

Easter finished, “Me!  They may say ‘dud,’ but I am a dude!    And a jock strap does not mean anyone had worn the jock strap, much less a star athlete, regardless of age.  Besides, before you moved here, when I played as a freshman on the baseball team…”

“You played sports?!?!”

“If they were desperate, I played right field and hoped that no one hit the ball that way.  I wasn’t that good at the plate either.  After the lockdown, I just didn’t try out, but Captain Hart’s youngest kid, Roger, was a senior when I was a freshman.  He taught me the locker room and shower trick.  Listen to what they say.  If they are not specific, they didn’t do it.  If they use the line about kissing and telling, they really have nothing to tell because if they were honorable in not telling, they would be honorable in not doing.  If they laugh too hard, they are lying about doing it.  Believe me, Jemima, we are not the only ones who have not done it, and not doing it is a good thing.  It is not a bad thing to stay on first base, but if you want me to unhook your bra, I can do that much.”

“I am not wearing a bra!  Thank you for not noticing!”  She got up and moved to the far section of the sofa.”

Glyce turned off the video.  “They kissed and made up during one of the really steamy scenes in the movie.  One reason we don’t want them to see such things.  It gives them ideas.  So what are you going to do about it?  What did you think of all this?”

I laughed, “What I focused on is her saying that she is the last virgin in the senior class and wondering whether Easter liked girls or not.  I remember hearing those words before.”

“No!  Please, you promised to not bring it up, never again!”

“It was how we first met.  And you just brought it up by showing me this – this thing where two kids admitted their desires, but they did not act upon them.  I graduated high school two years before you did, and I was already on the police force.  It was a Saturday night, and I had a squad car for a change since I was doing overtime.  I drove around the park, and I heard a noise.  I parked and saw a young girl on a grassy knoll.  She did not have a stitch of clothing on.  She was screaming, ‘I am the only virgin in my senior class.  I will spread my legs for anyone who will take me!’”  Glyce groaned, but I continued.  “You started shaking the homeless guys and drunks on the park benches and they simply rolled over.  I walked up behind you and threw a blanket around you and held you tight.”

Glyce had tears in her eyes, “And I melted into your arms, thinking that someone with gentle strong arms had finally ‘taken’ me, but when I turned around and saw that I had just been arrested by a cop, I tried to run.  You pulled me back into your patented bear hug.  At first, I resisted, but then I felt warm and calm.  I thought I was going to have sex with a cop at that point.”

“But I took you home instead.  I recognized you.  You were the star of the soccer team and the valedictorian of your class.  Everyone in town knew who you were and where you lived.  Arresting you would embarrass you and your parents, and other than the peep show, you had not caused any real disturbance.  No one had called it in.  You were belligerent all the way home, but I asked if I could date you and you changed your tune.  I used the idea of not taking you to the station as a trade to have you date me.  I was definitely not in your economic strata.  We overcame your father opening the door and finding you were naked, but I had some explaining to do.  You dropped the blanket, showing us everything.  You picked it up off the floor and started folding it, not making any move to cover yourself.  You said that I was the Good Knight, and you were the bad girl, and you had no idea where your clothes were.  Then you handed me the blanket, since it belonged to the squad car gear, and you said, ‘Good night, Good Knight.’  And you kissed me on the cheek.  I thought that was a nice touch.  Your Dad said nothing more, at least that night.”

Glyce mused, “Every boy I went out with was for only one date.  My emotions got far ahead of the situation, and the boys refused to date me again.  I scared them.  That night after the latest date dropped me off at the park, unable to handle my explosion inside his car, I was abandoned and convinced that it was impossible to love me.  At that point, I did not love myself, so, why not disrobe and beg someone to make love to me.  At least, that part of the deal would be behind me.”

I smiled, “And then there was the night I proposed.”

“Nooo!  You are breaking a lot of promises tonight!”

“Yes!  I am breaking promises.  Point of order, the sun will be up soon, and I am not sure if it is technically ‘night.’  And third, let’s get it all on the table.  We had been dating about three months.  We had never gone further than a kiss and a lot of hugs.  Hmmm, sounds like the video with the two teens on the sofa.  We were starting to date every day that I had a day off, even mid-week.  I even got you to go to church with me a couple of times.  That’s not easy when dealing with your house being full of atheists.  Then we were just going for a drive one night.  I asked you if you wanted to have a nice dinner or a cheap take-out meal and then a movie.  With my cash, it was one or the other, not both.  You pulled off your sweater and you were not wearing anything underneath.  I closed your window and locked the door from the driver’s side.  I had to prevent you from throwing your clothing away again.  You claimed that I had to prove that I liked girls by getting to second base or third base or I would never date you again.  And until I watched the video, I was still confused about those bases.  So, I said, ‘What if we get married?’”

Glyce said, “And I said that was the lamest proposal I had ever heard, not that I had ever heard any proposal personally, and you pulled off on the shoulder of the road, ran around the car, opened the door, dropped to one knee and produced a very oily ring.  I have cleaned it up since then, but it is still on my finger.  I may be the only one in my senior class that got a proposal while half naked.”

I shrugged, “I know a few from your class that might have been completely naked, but we won’t go there.  I never told you why the ring was oily.”  Glyce shook her head.  “My mother, when she found out I was going to date you for the first time, handed me a two-pack foil condom wrapper.  I protested that I would not have sex with you on the first date.  She said that one of the homeless guys in the park told her everything, and I might need it, but then she said to look closer.  One of the pouches had been opened with a knife and her wedding ring and her engagement ring were inside instead of a condom.  The other pouch still had the condom, just in case.  With my Dad probably never getting out of prison again, she wouldn’t need the rings, and she had a feeling we were going to get married.  She had a blind eye for Dad, but otherwise, she was a good judge of character.”

Glyce kissed me.  “I always loved her, but then even she didn’t know about my crazy father and his contract.  You did not go home the night you proposed until the sun was up.  Check that, you went to work without sleeping at all.  My father had to hammer out the details.  He would pay for your college degree and mine.  He would not have a son who was not college educated.  And he set aside enough money for me to get a doctorate.  And then you nearly ruined the entire thing with your demands.  You insisted that I be a virgin when we got married and that I attend church with you regularly.  I could skip church only if you were on patrol duty.”

I smiled, “But you didn’t skip a Sunday.  You accepted Jesus, and you eventually led your parents to Jesus.  Your father is an elder in the church now.  Once an atheist college professor, now an elder.  He thought getting beyond this virgin thing would be the key to calm you down.  And because of my insistence, he almost did not sign his own contract.  He was afraid that I was a flight risk because of your emotions, like every other boy that you ran off.”

Glyce nodded, “And you calmed me down with your hugs.  I could scream and throw fists and kick, but you just squeezed tighter until my heart rate came down, and then Jesus did the rest when He came into my heart.  With that healing, if I ever had the need to explode, you were there with a hug, and I melted just like I did that first night.  So, can you give Jemima a hug?”

I shook my head.  “No, Easter did a great job tonight.  He probably had a long cold shower, but he seemed okay.  He needs to administer the hugs.  He proved we can trust him.”

“No.  He proved that he knows where the cameras are.  I doubt if we can trust him if she keeps asking him, but will you talk to Jemima?”

“No, you will, Glyce.  In very similar ways, you two have travelled the same path.  You were unchurched and she is always at church, but otherwise, you are the same – smart, athletic, and a prey to all the world’s lies.  The sun is about to rise, as it did the night I proposed.  Why not we shower, wake up the children, go to church, get Pauline to take Sophie to a movie, and we can invite Jemima and Easter out for a picnic.  We will be finished before we have to pick up Blaise from his ‘science experience.’  We will have a tell-all for Jemima and Easter only.  Maybe you can become the calming voice that Jemima needs who can listen without judgment and also keep a secret from her parents, only if she insists.  Some things are best for her to confess directly.  I know our new pastor.  He can handle it.  But first, the grassy knoll for lunch.”

“Just like a police detective, always going back to the scene of the crime.”

I gave her a patented bear hug, and we walked hand-in-hand to the shower together.  Mine was a cold shower, my body would have shut down with warm water.  I fell asleep during the sermon, but Glyce nudged me.

Credits

Ariadne means “most holy” in Greek.  Lilith means “belonging to the night” in Greek.  Irony on both names.

The “grassy knoll” is mentioned in many of the JFK assassination conspiracy theories, many supposing a second gunman on the grassy knoll.  The interstate runs by that area.  You see the familiar scene, and for me, the memories flood back, having seen the news footage so many times.

This has been a work of fiction, but most of this story is based on real events, mostly experiences of close friends.  And today, with peer pressure going from the small group dynamic to several social media platforms, the pressure is greater and thus, the greater probability of exaggeration and out right falsehoods.

And as for those preacher’s kids that I know and love, we are still praying for you.  And not all Preacher’s Kids end up rebelling.

4 Comments

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  1. Well said! One of the heroines in my unpublished novel is labeled the “Town Slut,” but she really isn’t, so my character has a similar story.

    Liked by 2 people

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