Thoughts from Mark "Hat" Rackley

he said, “Listen to my words:
“When there is a prophet among you,
    I, the Lord, reveal myself to them in visions,
    I speak to them in dreams.
But this is not true of my servant Moses;
    he is faithful in all my house.
With him I speak face to face,
    clearly and not in riddles;
    he sees the form of the Lord.
Why then were you not afraid
    to speak against my servant Moses?”

• Numbers 12:6-8

Like a dream he flies away, no more to be found,
    banished like a vision of the night.
The eye that saw him will not see him again;
    his place will look on him no more.

• Job 20:8-9 (the words of Zophar)

I had a dream the other day or so it seemed, but then again, it was so real that it might not …

It is easier to tell the story of that night.  I will write what I write as I sensed it, not as it happened.  I know, I know, it is a fiction writer’s mistake to mislead you, but this is a true story, at least as I sensed it.

I watched a television program from 8:00-9:00pm and I was in bed about fifteen minutes later, thoroughly exhausted.  So exhausted, I had thought of forgoing the television show.  I was asleep almost immediately, which was strange in that I usually toss and turn for an hour or so.

I awoke about midnight.  I have a heart monitoring watch that also checks sleep patterns. If I press a button or shake my wrist, the screen comes on.  I know that it was slightly after midnight.  The watch said so.

I again awoke, as I often do.  The CPAP mask starts leaking or something is in pain.  This time, about 2:00am, my neck hurt.  I reached for the pain relief balm and rubbed some on my neck.  I have everything arranged next to the bed.  I never turned on the lights, but my watch let me know it was two-something.  Then I awoke at 3:11am.  I remember that time on the watch specifically.  My wife has awoken at 3:16am or pm so many times it is only God letting her know that she is still loved and is being cared for.  So, what of John 3:11?

“Very truly I tell you, we speak of what we know, and we testify to what we have seen, but still you people do not accept our testimony.”

• John 3:11

When we get done with this story, remember that verse.

But when I awoke at 3:11am, the CPAP mask was leaking.  I made a slight adjustment.  I rolled over.  And I did a face plant into the pillow.  There was no fear of suffocating since the CPAP provides a constant pressure of fresh air and I am constantly tossing and turning in my sleep anyway.

I must have been in a deep sleep at this point. I dreamed of sitting at a dining table and I was offered chips and a cheese dip that was in a bowl, the shape of the map of Mexico. I then awoke again at about 4:30am.  This was a dialysis day.  I stared at the ceiling and pondered whether I should get up and start my day or go back to sleep and have the alarm awaken me in less than an hour.

The next thing I remember, I awoke yet again.  I checked my watch because it had to be about the right time for the alarm to be going off.  It was exactly 11:20pm.

No, I did not sleep until 11:20pm the next night and miss taking my wife to dialysis.  It was suddenly about five hours before my last look at my watch.  I do not believe in time travel, but I do believe in dreams.  When I awoke at 11:20pm, there was no smell of the pain relief balm on my neck.  In fact, my neck was not hurting.  My tennis elbow was screaming in pain.  I got out the balm and applied it to the elbow.  It might not calm down the tendon inflammation, but the pain subsided.

I stared at the ceiling and prayed.  Aches and pains had awoken me four times during the night, now the time was before any of that happening.  It must have been a dream, but why?  What was the message?

I fell asleep an hour later, and I awoke at 3:00am and at 3:30am.  The next thought was the alarm going off.  But the remaining thought for most of that morning was a dream that felt so real, I still cannot consider it a dream. And if it was a dream, then the cheese dip was a dream within a dream.

I checked my watch the next day after it registered that I was fully awake.  The early sleep from about 9:15 to 11:20pm never registered.  This often happens with the watch if I awake before midnight.  Why?  I do not know, maybe thinking it was just a nap.  I should ask the watch manufacturer.  The watch registered that I went to sleep at 12:45am, roughly an hour after I had “awakened” at 11:20pm.  I awoke at 3:00am and 3:30am, just as I remembered.  I got about one hour of good sleep and a little over three hours of restless sleep, which often is not sleep at all.

So, what was it that happened between 9:15 and 11:20pm? Or was it 9:15pm and about 4:30am plus some more time?  That day, I functioned as if I had gotten three or more hours of good sleep, which would be the case when adding the two mystery hours to the one registered hour.  With only one hour of sleep, a nap would have been absolutely necessary. It would not have been safe for me to drive anywhere, but I drove my wife to three different appointments that day with no drowsiness.

If you look up dreams about sleeping on the internet, you get the meaning of a life change is about to happen.  At my age, the life change is probably kicking the bucket.  It would be cruel at this point to NOT write a post on anything for a week.  I might have to make a rebuttal like Mark Twain did.

“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.”

• Mark Twain

But who knows what God has in mind.  Maybe I will get a book deal!!  But then it may be something completely different.  Or maybe God just wanted me to write this post.

Note from the author of this post: I was sloppy in telling the story of the dream. I remembered a detail, but I did not include it. The last time of awakening was not 4:30am. It was 4:28. I did not see the significance, so I related it as near 4:30. Then two days later, after writing this post, I really did awaken at 4:28am. Since my wife awakens at 3:16, thinking of John 3:16, and I quoted John 3:11 because in the dream, I remember seeing that time. Here is John 4:28.

“Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people,“

• John 4:28

Yes, I think God wanted me to write this post. We need to put down the implements of our labors on occasion and go into town and tell the people. Jesus is alive. He works with us and among us. He is real and He can comfort us. But most importantly, He is God. He came to earth to provide a living sacrifice, to wash away our sins. You can believe Him and trust Him.

In the End Times, or nearing those times, young men shall see visions and old men will dream dreams.  I have often quipped that the reason for the difference here is that old men are probably taking a nap.  Which makes me think, it’s nap time!  Maybe God will explain that dream.

But as for the dream, I can only testify to what I know and state what I have seen, whether it was real or a dream. Jesus is my Savior.

Soli Deo Gloria.  Only to God be the Glory.