Thoughts from Mark "Hat" Rackley

Moses heard the people of every family wailing at the entrance to their tents. The Lord became exceedingly angry, and Moses was troubled. He asked the Lord, “Why have you brought this trouble on your servant? What have I done to displease you that you put the burden of all these people on me? Did I conceive all these people? Did I give them birth? Why do you tell me to carry them in my arms, as a nurse carries an infant, to the land you promised on oath to their ancestors? Where can I get meat for all these people? They keep wailing to me, ‘Give us meat to eat!’ I cannot carry all these people by myself; the burden is too heavy for me. If this is how you are going to treat me, please go ahead and kill me—if I have found favor in your eyes—and do not let me face my own ruin.”

• Numbers 11:10-15

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

• Matthew 11:28-30

“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

• Matthew 25:34-40

Referring to the second Scripture above and the featured photo above, Jesus is the ox to the left side of the photo, and I am the ox on the right side (more toward the center of the photograph). My burden is light, for Jesus takes on most of the burden, but I am still yoked to that burden. We all have our burden, but with Jesus, it is a lot easier. But what if we are the burden ourselves?

My wife’s motto late in life was that she did not wish to be a burden.  Not long before she died, a few months, she told me that she felt she was a burden to me.  Up until that point, she had done everything she could to not be a burden to others, no matter how much of a burden her effort was to me.  She would walk, or ride in her wheelchair, into the church and smile at everyone we passed.  She would talk to people and share their burdens by praying with people who had problems that were not a tenth as bad as hers.  And she disliked being placed on the prayer team’s prayer list.  I kept telling her, it is just one name among many.  That is not much of a burden.

Near the end of a brutal two-year period back about 25 years ago, I was emotionally, physically, and spiritually spent.  I had been out of work 16 of the previous 25 months, okay, two-years and a month.  The church where we attended came by with a basket full of canned foods and other dry goods.  They also came by with a gift certificate for us to buy things like milk, eggs, cheese, and meat.

I told the pastor that it was too much.  We had learned how to tighten our belts.  We could make it through.

Then the pastor told me, “It is extremely hard for the person who has always given to others to graciously accept a handout when they are in need.”

I guess I was like my wife.  I did not wish to be a burden to anyone either.  Was it the humbling experience of being a person in need?  After all, we might not have had much, but we shared what we had.  Or was it that servant attitude of serving others regardless of how weary we became because that was part of who we were?  There were times when our children were young where there was only three to five days a month when we did not have a charitable thing to attend (usually running the meeting).

But now to be the person in need, we felt like we were a burden.

But then, my wife passed away, nearly a year ago.  I thought I was taking care of myself, but at times, I felt my entire body was broken.  In December, I found out why.  I had a kidney stone, roughly an inch in length, completely blocking the kidney from functioning.  I never felt the standard kidney stone pain, I just felt so ill that I thought I was simply getting very old, very fast.  I have written before that this was a blessing in that I suffered, temporarily, like my wife had suffered for nearly twenty years.  Anyone with kidney failure, from the beginning stages to the end stage, they need a lot of prayers.

But when I discovered what was going on, I had driven myself to the hospital.  I was held in the hospital after an emergency outpatient surgery because there was no one to care for me at home.  Then with a ton of phone calls from the hospital, I found a couple from my Sunday school class who came to the hospital.  One took their car back home, while the other drove me to the pharmacy and then home.

I had “been a burden.”  They said that they were not doing anything that important that afternoon and I was their Sunday school teacher.  But I felt grateful and a burden at the same time.

Then, the emergency surgery just alleviated the pain.  A little over a month later, I had another surgery.  One lady dropped me off at the out-patient surgical center and the first couple picked me up.  Again, I was a burden.

Then two and a half weeks later, I went to the hospital again, for the final procedure.  A night’s stay in that I had no one at home, except God, but they said that was not sufficient.  Again people taking me.  Again people picking me up.  Again being grateful and feeling like a burden at the same time. And that procedure has led to a fourth procedure, since the stent removal led to another stent replacing it. In two weeks, another request for people helping me get there and get back home.

The Israelites were being too big of a burden on Moses, and God suggested 70 of the elders among the people to help handle some of the administration and judicious activities that Moses had performed.  Moses was glad that others were sharing his burden.  Jesus promises to share our burden.

Some people look at the last Scripture above, and they literally think that the homeless person that they fed was indeed Jesus Christ in the flesh, but I think not.  There are three players in the transaction.  There is the righteous person who feeds, provides drink or clothing, or provides shelter.  There is the king who sees such acts and counts it toward the favor of the righteous person.  And then, there is the needy person.  It is okay to be all three at one time or another.  God will reward those in the book of life based on such acts of kindness.  But we can observe those acts and pray for the righteous person to be blessed.  We can be that righteous person.  But even though we may dislike the idea altogether, God can bless us by humbling us to the point of being the needy person.  How do you react?

Sometimes it is best to simply be gracious and praise the Lord that you have friends that will help you.  It may be humbling, but in times like that, you learn who your true friends are.

Soli Deo Gloria.  Only to God be the Glory.