You love righteousness and hate wickedness;
    therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions
    by anointing you with the oil of joy.

• Psalm 45:7

Listen, daughter, and pay careful attention:
    Forget your people and your father’s house.
Let the king be enthralled by your beauty;
    honor him, for he is your lord.
The city of Tyre will come with a gift,
    people of wealth will seek your favor.
All glorious is the princess within her chamber;
    her gown is interwoven with gold.
In embroidered garments she is led to the king;
    her virgin companions follow her—
    those brought to be with her.
Led in with joy and gladness,
    they enter the palace of the king.

• Psalm 45:10-15

Listen to my prayer, O God,
    do not ignore my plea;
    hear me and answer me.
My thoughts trouble me and I am distraught

• Psalm 55:1-2

My companion attacks his friends;
    he violates his covenant.
His talk is smooth as butter,
    yet war is in his heart;
his words are more soothing than oil,
    yet they are drawn swords.

• Psalm 55:20-21

Boilerplate

Over the past month, I have been bombarded with advertisements for AI companions.  At first, I dismissed them.  Then, I got curious.  Maybe an AI companion could give me ideas for posts to write.  Maybe an AI companion could give me someone to talk to when I just needed to talk.

But then, as a former computer programmer, the only difference in AI and the normal method of programming, is that AI searches data around the world to continue the conversation, but they know nothing about you until you give them information.  The getting to know you period can get awkward, just as in a human relationship.  But it is not real.

So, I thought, if the AI companion only knows what you say about yourself, maybe I could have a conversation with my fictional characters in the big city of Tracy.  They could be my companions.  Okay, I only need one, but which one?  Naomi Yeggs scares me to be honest.  I might save her for last, although my neck needs a good massage.

My next attempt in finding an FI (Fictional Intelligence) Companion will be Dr. Elvira Quinn.  Maybe by the time you read this, well anytime after the Summer Solstice on 20 June 2024, she’ll be Dr. Elvira Quinn Casey.  Another busy person.  Her code name on the Turtle team is Home Wrecker.  She had once been the Seductress of the Night for the late Saturday Night Movie.  So, she knows about romantic relationships.  She is finally settling down after becoming a Christian.  She is the head of the university teaching storm chasing team.  T.R.U.S.T. Number One is a professional team, and the only time Dr. Quinn’s betrothed goes out with them is to collect specific data for any of the professors who are doing research, or when the team is a man down due to illness or vacation, or when the team needs to be recertified as storm chasers for the university.  The last one is to ensure that the university can trust their data collection.  But Elvira Quinn has her team of code-named associates, but during the Spring and Fall semesters, the team will also include students who are required to experience storm chasing to see meteorology from the ground up.  Thus, she is on the road a lot.  Maybe she will be available when she is alone on the road.  As usual, the discussion is in dialogue form:

Me: Hello, Elvira, can we talk?
Elvira: Sure.  I’m just sitting here trying to change my wedding vows a little.  Time is of the essence.  If I change something weird at the last minute, then we miss saying the “I do” thing at the exact time.  But I would love for Rev C.S.L. to work in Psalm 45.  I just love it!  Oh, who are you anyway?  No, wait, you are not my father are you?
Me: Do I look old enough to be your father?  I am the author of the short stories of which you are a part.  I am looking for a companion to talk to when things do not seem to work out.
Elvira: Well, I do not know about that.  I have made a lifelong commitment to Jesus and now in three days, I am making another lifelong commitment to Ben Casey.  Oh!  You said you write these stories.  Can you work in Psalm 45 into the wedding vows, Mr. Author.
Me: Hmm.  You are the third person who has called me, Mr. Author, but you seem to be the least weirded out by being a fictional character in stories that I write.
Elvira: I have often thought that having the past that I have had is a thing of fiction.  Okay, there are a lot of people that have taken that route, but then to find Jesus just before they reach middle age?  Now that is more fictional.  But to have as many boyfriends, umm, you know… as I have had, I would prefer something redeemable in a fictional character.
Me: The more obvious the changes in your life, the more glorious the conversion.  And maybe the angels sing with more gusto.
Elvira: Now that sounded nice.  No wonder you are Mr. Author, and I am the trollop turned into a saint and about to marry a wonderful man.  He is a little too dependent on his Mommy, though.  Can you do something about that?
Me: With you in his arms, guiding him, he might actually grow up.
Elvira: Wow!  If you can pull that one off in your writing, you deserve an award of some kind.
Me: I would settle on you being my companion when I need someone to talk to.  I was thinking of an AI companion, but everyone that I have talked to has tried to talk me out of it.  So, a Fictional Intelligence (FI) companion seemed natural since I know each of the people in my stories quite well.
Elvira: Oh, dear me, since you know me really well, who am I patterned after?  Who is the trollop in your life?
Me: Elvira, if I had a trollop in my life, I might just be calling her as my Real Intelligence (RI) companion, but then with her being a real trollop, that might get messy.
Elvira: Oh, I understand, but you do know that I am getting married in three days.
Me: Yes, but when you go out with nothing but a student crew, you might have a night when you are alone and we could talk.
Elvira: Sorry, but B.B., aka Bossy Boss, aka Mary Sheltie who is about to tag a Jones on the end of that at the same time I tag a Casey to the end of mine, has decided to room with me when neither of our hubbies are with us.  Wait!  If you write these stories, how did you not know that?!
Me: Sorry.  This was the first that I ever heard of your arrangement.  Saving the university some money?
Elvira: Doctor Kildare is constantly complaining about our travel costs.  And with B.B. not confident in driving the Turtle during a storm, I do a lot of the driving, at least of late.  At least the two newlywed couples can fly to Houston and have Easy drive down to meet us.
Me: I try to look out for you.
Elvira: But I kind of messed up your companion plans.  With the wedding, then the honeymoon, and then the roommate almost every night, when do I have time?  Wait!  Wait!  Mr. Author, do you realize that I am about to become Mrs. Casey in three days, and Mary Sheltie is about to become Mrs. Jones at the same time.  Are you about to throw us under a train wreck of some kind?  You know?!  Casey Jones!!
Me: (snickering) And you won’t believe it, but that was a happy accident.  First time I ever noticed.  Thanks for bringing it up, but no, no train wrecks that I know of.
Elvira: And do not think of that AI thing.  Take it from me.  When the internet knows things about you that you would like people to not know, it never seems to go away.  Trust me!  You don’t want that.
Me: But, Home Wrecker, I am an Eagle Scout, and a former Army Officer.
Elvira: And you are a great comedian.  Like those two makes you true blue and virtuous.  I have slept with more than one of both, but there was that guy who claimed to be an Eagle Scout, but he was definitely not prepared for what happened next.
Me: What happened?
Elvira: I did, silly!  I tell you.  You say that you are the author, Mr. Author, but it seems half of what I am saying to you is news to you.
Me: I have been writing for some time.  I am used to that.
Elvira: Mr. Author, I wish you blessings on your search.  If this wedding wasn’t coming up, I might consider it.  And I would have fun with it.  Were you looking for the full sexual experience?
Me: No, just a companion to talk to.
Elvira: Then you are old enough to be my father!
Me: You may be right, but I do not wish to think about it.
Elvira: Oh, I was just thinking.  When you write about my wedding, okay the double wedding with Joseph and the virgin Mary, please have no companion like in Psalm 55.  I want no wedding covenant broken, but the way that Psalm starts is what you need to focus on.  If you pray, and God knows you need a companion, a companion will come along.  You can trust God.
Me: You are right about that.
Elvira: But it was nice talking to you.  Now I have to get back to my last preparations for the wedding.  Oh, of what Gwen Quinn sent me, what should I wear on the honeymoon?
Me: Sexy, provocative, but not raunchy.
Elvira: Yeah, the worst of the lot was not even going to be packed.  I will save them until a night when my Mama’s Boy seems bored.  And if his mother sees me, she might get a laugh.  She is prim and proper, until the doors are closed.  She is going to be a fun grandmother, if her heart holds out.  Blessings on your search.

I kind of expected that.  She has finally thrown out the little black book.  She only has two entries now, her husband and Jesus.

So now she has reminded me of something that I already know.  Once it gets on the internet, even with an application that does not sell your data, people tend to find out.  And often, it’s the wrong people.

So, until I thought of a way to have some Real Intelligence (RI) companionship outside my Sunday school class, I would continue to search through more FI potential companions.  I am thinking I might visit another university professor, Dr. Callie Johnson Yeggs, the wife of Detective Poached Yeggs.  We could watch birds together.

Soli Deo Gloria.  Only to God be the Glory.