Thoughts from Mark "Hat" Rackley

Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled.

• Titus 2:2-6

Teach us to number our days,
    that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

• Psalm 90:12

Gray hair is a crown of splendor;
    it is attained in the way of righteousness.

• Proverbs 16:31

The New Boilerplate

My wife filled a small book with “Angel” on the cover.  It was hidden with a box of crafting things.  On 18 July 2025, I thought I had posted the last of these.  But this little angel book held a prayer, followed by 71 quotes.  So, the “with a little help” series is back in business for a while.  And it will be fun for me.  She did not attribute any of the quotes.  The first quote was from James A. Garfield, the 20^th president of the USA.  The next one was disputed, with some thinking it originated with Teddy Roosevelt and others saying Fred Astaire.  After the prayer, these might be on the lighter side.

Her quote

“No matter how often I tell people I’m thirty-nine some of them refuse to believe I’m that old.”

• Jack Benny (1894-1974)

The Discussion

Jack Benny made many claims to being 39 years old.  He was legitimately 39 once.  He claimed 39 for 41 more years.  I remember one year.  He claimed that he looked thirty-nine, and he was losing patience with everyone who doubted him.  Then, the camera zoomed in on his face and the make-up department had painted hundreds of wrinkles all over his face.

My wife complained that no one thought she was as old as she was. 

The then leader of the prayer team said, “You look like you could do cartwheels.”  That leader moved.

After my wife passed away, people’s attitude changed.  They were amazed that she was that sick, but she greeted everyone with a smile.  People were so shocked.  Smiling under those conditions was unthinkable.

But between the two of us, and only a couple of her family members, she would say that she did not want to be a burden on anyone.  Just wincing in pain meant the nurse had to take action, so she tried not to even do that.  I had to tell the doctor what was wrong; she refused.

As for me, my mother would brag about how my brother and sister broke half the bones in their body, but I never had a broken bone.  Now I had more stitches than my brother and sister combined.

But recently, I have had doctors ask me when did I break my arm, hand, foot, or slipped a disc in my back?  I would deny it, but then they showed me the x-rays.

It has taken a while, but I have figured it out.  I am a lot like my wife, but for different reasons.  She determined that she would not be a burden.  I was not allowed to be a burden.  I have mentioned that my mother hated me, privately, maybe not admitting it to herself, but neglecting a pain that she would take action upon if it had been my siblings was just a bit of evidence.

“Rub dirt on it.”

“Real men do not cry.”

As a result, I have an unexplained limp, poor posture, Clutz at times, stumble at times, and I have difficulty doing basic chores with my left hand (like applying shaving cream – it brings a whole new meaning to turning the other cheek. I physically cannot apply shaving cream to the other cheek with my left hand.).  But I do what I always have done, overcompensate with what is left that works properly.

Basically old people who are self-sufficient do that.

Let’s face it, no matter whether others think we can do cartwheels, when you get old, some things just do not work right anymore.

And why do I say this?

• There is someone at your church that has a servant’s heart and is still doing physical work to help others while in their nineties.
• There is someone at your church that looks like they were twenty years younger than what their driver’s license says.
• There are some people who act like they are twenty years younger.
• There are people at your church who are always smiling.
• There are people at your church in their 80s and 90s that say “I am great!”

In God’s eyes, they are blessed, but they are not great.  The great is what people see, but then they do like I do nearly every Sunday after church.  They go home and have an accidental nap, because showing everyone that they are great takes every ounce of energy that they have that day.

And why do they say that they are great?  What my wife’s mantra was.  I want to not be a burden to anyone.

Pray for those “healthy looking” people.  It takes a lot of energy to “keep up appearances.”

Soli Deo Gloria.  Only to God be the Glory